Shawn and Marlon Wayan play two FBI agents who suck at their job. Two rich girls are targeted to be kidnapped, and the Wayan Brothers are given the job to pick them up from the Airport and take them to the Hampton's, where they'll be under protection by the FBI. However, the Wayan Brothers screw that up, by getting into an accident, which wounds the girls that they are protecting. The Wayan Brothers, decide to pose as the two WHITE girls and try to catch the criminal themselves. I'm going to say this about the plot, the film completely downplays the whole mystery aspect on who the real kidnapper is. In fact, I don't think the 7 writers who wrote this film cared about it either (7 WRITERS, PEOPLE!). It's just there as an excuse for the Wayan Brothers to dress in drag and wear white make-up.
The minute when the film started with the Wayan Brothers in disguise as Latinos, I was ready to turn the film off. It's so offensive, stereotypical, and unfunny that I felt like I was watching a Latino ministerial show done by African Americans. However, and sadly, I let the film play on. When I finally saw the Wayan Brothers in White Face AND IN DRAG, I was just as disgusted as when I saw them in the opening. I'm not offended by the fact that they're in White Face; as a white American, I have a sense humor, and I have seen that concept done before, which I found funny. What I'm disgusted about is how horrible they look. They don't look like White Girls, they look like Mike Myers playing the Cat In The Hat in drag, and they're creepy too. What kind of idiot would actually think that they're White models. It's as stupid as if someone thought a guy in Blackface with the giant white lips, and stereotypical mannerisms, was actually a real black man! Their personality as these White Girls is so annoying and obnoxious that I cried when I found out that I was only 30 minutes in. I was willing to give up reviewing this film knowing that I'm going to be stuck seeing scary as crap White Face, with horrible childish humor throughout the rest of the film. As for the Wayan Brothers themselves without the make-up, they're boring and forgettable.
The supporting characters suck just as bad the Wayan Brothers themselves. It's pointless for me to talk about every White Girl in this movie, because they all have the same exact personality, and that is ANNOYING AS JAR JAR BINKS! They all act like the stereotypical rich white girl, only they're not black actresses in White face, they're real White actresses. All they do throughout the film is gossip, shop, look good, act spoiled, and bitch and moan, which gets annoying really fast. They're just as annoying as the Wayan Brothers themselves! Then there's Terry Crews as a rich black man who digs young White woman, and constantly hits on Marlon Wayan in his disguise. Gee, a rich guy hitting on a Woman who's really a man in disguise, haven't seen that before! The relationship between them is not funny as Jack Lemmon and Joe.E Brown in "Some Like It Hot", it's annoyingly unfunny. I like that Marlon Wayan tries to act all gross to shake off this rich man (AGAIN, HAVEN'T SEEN THAT CLICHE DONE BEFORE!), but adding the disgusting scenes with the White make-up and drag, makes me want to look away in disgust, even thinking about it now makes me want to barf. There's a News reporter that Shawn Wayan falls in love with, by switching between identities from a White girl, to a rich black man, who actually pretends to own the mansion that the rich guy owns, while the rich guy is dating Marlon Wayan. Yeah, haven't seen that done before either. Unlike in "Some Like It Hot", where that concept worked between Tony Curtis and Marylin Monroe; here it plays little to no part in the story, and feels forced into the story as filler. The moments that are supposed to be funny between them aren't funny; and the romance is not only as forced as this subplot, it's really corny and unengaging. Marlon Wayan also has a Wife, who thinks that Wayan is cheating on her for another woman, and while it doesn't feel as phoned in as the whole subplot with Shawn and the News reporter, it's still not as funny as it could have been, it just feels dully played out. There's not even any chemistry between the Wife and Marlon; its just fight, argue, and make up, that's it. Oh, and John Herd is in the film, and not only am I wondering why he'd agree to be in this picture, but I'm completely bored by him since the film gives him nothing to do. You also have Two white FBI agents, who spend most of the film playing games that are as pointless and unfunny as the whole film is. As for the FBI Chief, he's as forgettable as John Herd's performance in the film.
So the concept sucks, the casting and characters suck, and it's cliche as heck. The main problem the film suffers, out of the three problems that this film has aside from the Wayan Brothers acting like annoying White demons from hell, is it's cliche. Seeing these cliches done so poorly, and unfunny, as well as looking at the Wayan Brothers in that hideous make-up, this film makes me wish that I was watching a more sophisticated film where people have to dress in drag, like "Mrs.Doubtfire", "Tootsie", or "Some Like It Hot". The only time I ever laughed at the film is when the rich guy finds himself in bed, with the guy that tried to help him drug Marlon Wayan, that's it. The rest of the jokes in this film are annoying and dull than they are offensive. By the way, when they use the audio clip of the line "Where are the White Woman at" from "Blazing Saddles", or when I hear Dean Martin's song "That's Amore" play during a painfully unfunny scene, I can't believe I'm seeing such high art, be included in such a trashy stereotypical film. It's really a god awful film, and I hope that they don't make a "White Chicks 2".
RATING 0/5
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