JIMMY NEUTRON'S NICKTOON BLAST

A few weeks ago, I reviewed the simulation ride "The Funtastic World Of Hanna-Barbera". Even though I found the ride fun and thrilling, I criticized the absence of some main cartoon characters in each world; the lame CGI background with the 2-D animation; and found the ride to be very forgettable. The ride was closed down years later and a new animated simulation ride was released in 2003 called...

 

This is the ride that replaced "The Funtastic World Of Hanna-Barbera", and even though most of us grew up with "Hanna-Barbera", we also grew up with "Nickelodeon" and the number 1 thing we all remember from the channel is the "Nicktoons". So is this a ride that's going to fail like the original ride or is it a great replacement; ON WITH THE REVIEW!

THE PRE-SHOW


Guests walk into the "Nickelodeon Sound Stage" and on a monitor above guests is Jimmy Neutron who welcomes the guests to the studio, where he'll be giving guests a tour around the studio. That all changes fast when the Yokian alien Ooblar breaks into the studio and steals Jimmy's new rocket. Ooblar's plan is to bring the rocket back to his brother King Goobot so that he can duplicate it and then have his armies enslave the Earth.

When I first saw Jimmy, Carl, Ooblar and Jimmy's robotic dog Goddard. I got the same reaction and enjoyment I get when I watch the movie or the show. Jimmy's talking about his new invention to the audience; Carl messes things up’ and Goddard is just as cool as he is in the show and movie. I also really got a kick out of Ooblar with his over the top humor and personality, as well as finding it hilarious that he's disguised as a tourist in the park. The only down side to this is we don't see Jimmy’s friend Sheen, but then again Jimmy mostly hangs out with Carl and tests his inventions on him, so I don't find it a big disappointment.

The set up is fine but there is one question I have, why does Ooblar have to steal Jimmy's rocket? I know it's to duplicate it and enslave the Earth but they're aliens, they have huge ships shaped like chickens, why not duplicate those or better duplicate the giant alien chicken Poltra and send it to attack the Earth. You don't need puny rockets to take over the planet. I understand that it's probably for more soldiers to attack different parts of the planet but come on; surely this alien race can do better than just duplicating a simple rocket that they can easily make.

THE MAIN SHOW


The chase is on and you and Jimmy are chasing after Ooblar through the "Nicktoon Studio" passing many of the Nicktoon characters. Instead of showing a few main characters, we pass almost every character in the history of Nicktoons. We see the characters from "Hey Arnold","Rugrats","The Fairly Odd Parents","Rocket Power","The Angry Beavers","Ren and Stimpy",” “Rocko's Modern Life","Invader Zim","The Wild Thronberry's","As Told By Ginger" "Chalk Zone", and “Spongebob Squarepants” where if you blink an eye, you could miss a few them. This is what "The Funtastic World Of Hanna-Barbera" should of been, not picking your best work and limiting the characters, it should be going all full out and show as many as you can. Ok, not all Nicktoon characters appear but its still a lot more than what the previous ride did.

We also get to check out the planet where the Yokians live and see more places than we did in the film and not only do we meet King Goobot but we also get chased by Poltra and yes they do play the "Chicken Dance" at some point on this ride. The ride also has tons of laughs where it never stops. For me the funniest moments that happen on the ride are when Cosmo turns Ooblar into Elvis and when we see Angelica get the pain that she deserves. From what I remember of my experience on the ride, it did have a lot of thrills. I guess the only thing I can criticize about the ride is the animation; it's just as lame as "The Funtastic World Of Hanna-Barbera". We got a computer animated backgrounds which makes things odd and out of place for the 2-D animated characters to be in this world. However I will say it can look neat at some points but where the animation really works is when we're in Jimmy Neutron's studio and the Yokian planet.

It is better than the "The Funtastic World Of Hanna-Barbera" but however it suffers the same the problem with the animation and it doesn't have as good of a plot compared to the last ride. However, I'm sure kids and Nickelodeon fans will indeed enjoy it. Not the best but it is so not bad. If you haven't experienced the ride, you can still find it on "YouTube".

RATING 4/5

MY NUMBER 1 FAVORITE MOVIE VILLAIN

Well, this is it, my number 1 favorite film villain. I must say I chose this villain as number 1 the second I started this list because this villain left a huge impression on my life and has shocked tons of people who saw this villain. I'll tell you, as time goes by and when new villains are put on the big screen, this villain will always be my number 1 favorite. Who is it, let's get on with it.

Here's what the eerie narrator says about this villain in the trailer.

"There is a creature alive today. Who has survived millions of years of evolution. Without change, without passion and without logic. It lives to kill. A mindless eating machine. It will attack and devour anything. It is as if God created the devil and gave him Jaws."

THE SHARK (JAWS)


Before I start talking about it, I'm sure a lot of you are thinking "Tyler that's not a person!" Even though you are right that doesn't stop me for making it as my number favorite. In case if you haven't noticed, there are indeed some people put villains who are not human on the top of their lists. Both Gene Siskel and Doug Walker put the Robot HAL from "2001: A Space Odyssey" as number 1 on their lists and it's not human. Doug Walker also put the Devil in "Fantasia" (I know it has a name but they never say his name in the film) as the number one best Disney Villain and he's not only not human, but only shows up for a few minutes. Even creatures like the Alien has appeared on countless lists, and it doesn't have much of a personality. So regardless what your argument is that's not ever going to change the Shark being my all time favorite all-time, and I' shall gladly go into detail why.

WARNING: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS



The scary thing about the shark is we don't see it until we get to the climax of the movie. Most time we see through its eyes as the epic scary theme by John Williams plays. In the beginning of the film, the shark feeds on a naked female swimmer and the scary thing about the scene is we just see the girl being tossed around screaming until she's pulled under water. Just imagining what the shark is munching on down there, is in many ways more disturbing than actually seeing it. Originally the director Steven Spielberg was going to have the shark leap out of the water and swallow the victim, but decided to not do it because he'd think the rest of the film wouldn't be scary and you know what, he's right. I also like that we don't see the blood either. The deaths that happen in the film gradually get more shocking and grotesque as it's building up to the shark's reveal, that I think is highly clever than using every technique when scaring the viewer in the first scene. And as if the image of Chrissie being pulled underwater and disappearing isn't chilling enough, the next day as Chief Brody looks for her on the beach, all we see of her is her hand being eaten by crabs, which gives us our very first image involving somebody losing a limb that appears when we least expect it.

The Mayor of the Island refuses to close the beaches since the summer is the time of year where they make most of their money, so the beaches are kept open and what follows is a very intense scene. Brody is with his family on the beach, but is very uncomfortable because he knows that there's a shark in the water, but there's nothing he can do about it. Throughout the scene, we think we see the shark but it turns out to be something else. The first time when we know the Shark is at the beach is when the owner of a dog, calls out the dog's name where the only thing we see of the dog is the fetching stick floating in the water. The shark then decides to feed on another human being and the human it chooses to eat is a little boy riding on a raft. As we see the boy getting eaten; we see fountains of blood squirting out of the child; and the last we see ever of the child is him being dragged under the water screaming as blood nearly covers the screen. Chief Brody yells for the people to get out of the water and as people rush, we see the Mother looking for his son, but all that's left of him is a ripped up bloody raft. That has to be one of the harshest deaths I have ever seen on screen and to make things worse it's happening to a child.

After when the Mayor offers a reward to kill the shark, we see two guys on a small dock where one of them put their wife's holiday roast on a hook to capture the shark. As time goes by, they see the chain being pulled and as the chain reaches its end, it makes the dock collapse, sending the two men to fall into the water. One of them makes it on land, while the other one is being chased by the shark after his friend sees a piece of the dock turning around and follows him. What I love about this scene is it has a good mix between horror and comedy almost like the encounter with Ichabod and The Headless Horseman in Disney's "The Adventures Of Ichabod and Mr.Toad". You have two men who don't know what they're doing; one of them whines; they're using a roast expecting to actually capture the shark with it and buy a replacement with the money they would earn; and it is revealed in dialogue that after the failed capture, they sit there trying to figure out how to tell Charlie's wife about what happened "To her freezer full of meat". But as you're laughing at how foolish they are, the darkness, music, angles, and the image of the dock chasing after poor Charlie creates an eerie mood that gives me goosebumps!

Brody hires marine biologist Matt Hooper to help out. Hooper confirms that the girl (From the beginning of the film) was killed by a shark and when a group of Shark hunters capture the shark, Matt proves to Brody that it's not thee shark. Matt and a drunken Brody who's afraid of the water, go on a boat and search for the shark at night. They see a bucket of chum drifting on the ocean and find a damaged boat. Matt decides to go down below and check it out. In one hole, he finds a Shark tooth, which appears to be the tooth of a great white. As Matt looks through another hole, we hear a loud screech and see the head of a dead captain. That scene always catches me off guard as the scene is given a very ominous feel to create a heavy atmosphere to add to the levels of tension.

Even though Matt and Brody know that there's a shark still coming after people on the shores of Amity Island, the Mayor still keeps the beaches open. After two kids pull off a hoax which causes a massive panic, the real Shark is in the pond where Brody's son is. Brody's son Michael and his friends are on a sailboat that he got for his birthday and they see a man in a little row boat talking to them. The Shark knocks both boats over and swallows the man in front of Michael and all that's left of him is his bloody leg. If you look carefully, you can see for a few seconds of the shark creeping up and munching on him, making it the first reveal of the shark. Shockingly the death of the man in the estuary and Michael's close encounter with the shark was supposed to be longer.  What was originally supposed to happen after his leg gets torn off, we would then see him on top of the water looking barely alive in the shark's mouth with blood oozing out of his mouth with Michael in his hands. As he's about to take Michael underwater with him, he lets him go and then disappears. The scene was so violent and carried a concept more disturbing than any of the other scenes that caused Speilberg to unfortunately cut it. The shark then passes Michael leaving him in shock and is then sent to the hospital. A distressed Mayor finally decides to hire a salty sea captain named Quint to kill the shark because his kids "were at that beach too".

Our three main characters Brody, Hooper and Quint go out on a boat to kill the Shark where the story officially begins. As they're in open water, Quint feels something pulling his fishing pole. He straps himself and gets ready for battle. Again, we don't see the shark but we do know it's there even though Hooper denies it. The scary part is we don't know what the shark is going to do, even when it's under the boat. The wire then snaps and Quint proves to Hooper that only a shark can bite through a piano wire.

Later on, Brody starts chumming to attract the shark and while he's making a joke, the shark suddenly appears out of the water biting the chum. A frightened Chief Brody slowly walks backwards and tells Quint, one of the most famous improvised lines in cinema history and the three of them are amazed of how big the shark is. This scene not only shows fully the shark, but it happens during a joke and before you could even laugh, the shark appears catching you off guard and scares the viewers nearly half to death. As the shark circles the boat, Quint fires a harpoon at the shark with a barrel attached to it, to tire the shark out and keep track of it, but the shark successfully manages to dive underwater leaving the three men disappointed, as their boat drifts into a gorgeous yet foreboding sunset.

We then cut to one of the best scenes in the movie. The three men are eating dinner and drinking, they show each other their scars, and Quint tells a chilling story about his experience on "The U.S.S. Indianapolis. What I love about the film and the villain is the dialogue they give about the shark or sharks in general. A couple of my favorite lines are "To open the beaches on the fourth of July is like ringing the dinner bell"; "I'm not going to waste my time arguing with a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch."; " he keeps swimmin' around in a place where the feeding is good until the food supply is gone."; "This was no boat accident, it was a shark"; "I think that I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and BITES YOU ON THE ASS!"; " Back home we got a taxidermy man. He's gonna have a heart attack when he sees what I brung him!"; and of course "You're gonna need a bigger boat". The one that tops it all is Quint's story which took three people to write including the actor Robert Shaw. Even though it's a bit historically inaccurate, it’s still a great speech. My favorite part of the speech is how Quint talks about a shark. "You know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all the poundin' and the hollerin', they all come in and they... rip you to pieces." But the most disturbing part of the story is when Quint finds his old friend where he discovers that "he had been bitten in half below the waist". After the speech, they sing a song and all of a sudden the Shark comes back and attacks them, damaging their boat and dogging Quint's bullets. After the attack the three men sit on the boat, while drifting by a full moon as a shooting stars pass them. My god what an incredible scene, that for me sums up nearly everything that makes this film such a classic!

While fixing the damaged boat, the Shark appears again. As they reach for the barrels, the Shark catches the audience off guard again, injuring Quint that's then followed by an epic duel between the three men and the shark. They fire harpoons with barrels attached to them; shoot bullets at it; tie it up; and try to drown it to shallow water but shark not only can take every abuse, but it's also highly intelligent unlike any other shark that Quint has ever faced. It damages the boat; pulls the boat backwards while it's tied up; and chases after the boat at full speed, while the boat's moving slow.

While the boat is sinking, Matt decides to go into an anti shark cage to get closer to the shark and stab it with poison in the mouth. As Matt is in the cage, the shark tries to break the cage open to kill Matt. During this thrilling scene, Matt drops the needle and is scared to death. He even takes out a knife and stabs the shark multiple times and the Shark still charges at him with no effect at all. Matt escapes from the shark and hides, while the shark tares the cage apart. The cool thing about this scene is if you look closely you can see the actual Shark footage. When the Sharks tearing the cage apart when Hopper escapes, that's not an animatronic its real footage of a shark that in reality got its nose caught in the cage, that fits the scene brilliantly. 

The Shark then leaps out of the water and cracks the boat in half. As the boat sinks, Quint slides into the mouth of the shark and gets the most brutal death in the whole movie. You actually see the shark eat him from his waist and tare him apart while Quint's stabbing the shark with a knife. Once the shark takes one last chomp of Quint, he pukes out blood and his body goes underwater and gets swallowed. I swear this has to be one of the most violent scenes that I ever saw in film, and one of the most poetically horrofying ones as well since Quint is suffering the same fate that his fellow troops have suffered.

Brody is now left alone and has to kill the shark himself. The shark burst through the cabin windows trying to eat Brody, but he throws a scuba tank with compressed air in the Shark's mouth and climbs up the mast (Which by the way, the actor had to improvise his way out). He tries to stab the shark with a harpoon, but then loses it, leading us to one of the best death scenes to ever happen to a villain. As the Shark charges at Brody, he shoots the compressed air tank which causes the shark to explode and then we the shark sinks to the bottom of the ocean while hearing a roar of a T-Rex as a reference to Spielberg's film "Duel" and some what foreshadows on Spielberg's later film "Jurassic Park". Brody and Matt swim to shore and the film ends.

Another huge reason why I chose the shark as number 1 is the many difficulties Spielberg had with it. The guy who made the Shark was a retired special effects maker named Bob Mattey (Who created the giant squid in one of my favorite live action Disney films "20,000 Leagues Under The Sea"). Once he and his crew finished making the shark they named it Bruce (Which will be made fun of in Disney Pixar's "Finding Nemo".). As soon as Spielberg got the shark, he had many problems with it. It would malfunction in the cruel  cold water; it would not work half the time; and it even sunk to the bottom of the ocean once. Spielberg and the crew waited for days and days for the shark to work and if he doesn't finish the film soon, Spielberg would be fired and probably wouldn't want to direct ever again. Meaning we would more that likely won't have classics like "E.T.", "Jurassic Park", "Schindler's List", and "Raiders of the Lost Ark".

 

My third huge reason is the reception the film got. Audiences who saw this film were scared to death. Most people didn't even go swimming after they saw this film; some didn't go into their own bathtub. The shark is also still scary even to this day. The build up to it; lack of screen time; the score; the directing; the acting from the main characters; and the dialogue, make it not only my favorite villain, but also one of my all time favorite films as well. Unlike most villains, the shark only has one purpose and that's to kill. It doesn't have a plan, it doesn't have remorse, and nothing will stop it from killing people. Every scene with the sharks is scary as hell and will make you think twice before going into the water.

"JAWS. SEE IT BEFORE YOU GO SWIMMING"

Now for those of you who are wondering why I didn't put a Disney Villain or a Batman Villain on my list. Well, those are different lists.

Tune in later this week for the next list.

MY 2ND FAVORITE MOVIE VILLAIN

HANNIBAL LECTER(ANTHONY HOPKINS)

FROM "THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS"

This is the villain that won the Oscar against Robert De Niro as Max Cady, and to be honest he deserves the Oscar because he's an iconic villain. Every scene you see him in is an epic win and to me is scarier than the films main villain Buffalo Bill. Why is he so scary, lets take a look.

WARNING: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS

Before we meet the villain we get incredible scary build up to him. The FBI supervisor Jack Crawford tells the main character Clarice to not let Hannibal get inside her head and Doctor Chilton tells her that "He's a monster" and it's rare to capture him alive. After giving Clarice the rules of meeting Hannibal, he tells her a story about Hannibal complaining about chest pains and was taken to the dispensary. When the nurse looked at him, he nearly killed her by eating her flesh. Clarice then takes a slow terrifying walk down a dark hallway while passing psychopaths in bared jail cells and as the intense just builds and builds, we then finally meet Hannibal.

He's in a glass cell with air holes and he's already standing up in the middle of his cell smiling, with his eyes in the darkness as he politely greets the agent. Man what a creepy introduction because instead of sitting down like most people do in prison, he's already standing as if he can smell her coming in. Lecter then asks to see her ID credentials and tells her to move closer and closer until we can see it clearly and once we do, Hannibal moves forward and we see is bright blue evil eyes. Hannibal feels insulted that an FBI trainee is testing him and refuses to take the test but he decides to talk to Clarice. He tells her to sit down and then smells her through the air holes, telling the frightened agent what she's wearing on her skin and what she wore previously, which is plain just scary. He then shows her drawings of places he remembers and tells her that memory is all he has. After asking a question about the killer Buffalo Bill, he then decides to look at the profile questionnaire and than tells Clarice about him knowing her Hillbilly roots and asks about her father. Hannibal then gives back the test to Clarice through a sliding food tray and tells her that he ate a guy who tested him and slithers at Clarice. He then tells her to "Fly back to school" and turns his back to her whispering in his eerie voice” fly fly fly". After Clarice is harassed by an inmate an angry Lecter who just developed Clarice as his love interest tells Clarice to come back. He apologizes for the inmate’s action and instead of taking a test, he decides to make Clarice happy and tells her to "look deep within yourself" and look up a woman named Miss Moffet. After the first encounter with Lecter we see a frightened Clarice run out of the asylum, has a flashback of her father, and cries after meeting Lecter. This whole encounter is scary because not only is the character scary and can smell things that not many people can smell but he also tries to get into Clarices mind, that alone is just petrifying.

Clarice looks up Miss Moffet and finds a separate head of a man with make up on in an old storage garage called "Within Yourself" and after this event, we then go to our second encounter with Hannibal. After Clarice asks him a few questions, he responds by sliding a food tray with a rag on it and Clarice accepts it which causes her to break one of the rule. As he sits in the darkness, he tells her, that her bleeding has stopped from her scratch. Wow, how the heck does he know all these things? He then tells her who Miss Moffet really is and assures her that he didn't kill him. After asking her how she felt when she saw the head, he then asks if Jack Crawford wants her sexually. After that, the lights in his cell comes on and it appears that his drawings are gone as punishment for killing the inmate who harassed Clarice and also has to watch a gospel program on a TV in front of his cell. Hannibal then looks up at the lights symbolizing the light of the sun and tells Clarice that he can help her catch the killer if she can have him transported to an asylum with a window, a library and to be far way from Dr.Chilton. This whole scene is another scary sequence. Hannibal sitting in the darkness is scary as hell and it hints that he killed the inmate as revenge for harassing Clarice and that he might be jealous of Crawford who maybe hitting on his love.

Our third encounter with him is when Clarice lies to him about transporting him to an asylum so she can get him to give her information about Buffalo Bill. Hannibal agrees but decides to play a little game of "Quid Pro Quo" with Clarice. He'll give her information about Buffalo Bill but only if Clarice tells him about her past and deepest darkest secrets. Clarice agrees and as you watch their conversation, you see Hannibal’s reflection on the glass where Clarice is, which shows that he's succeeded with getting inside her mind.

Later we then see Hannibal strapped onto a rolling hand truck in a strait jacket with a hockey mask on his mouth so he won't bite a piece of someone's flesh. Chilton taunts Hannibal and tells him that Clarice has lied to him about transporting him to another asylum which makes a heartbroken Lecter whisper to himself "Clarice". Chilton however, designed a deal for him to be transported but while he's telling him that, Hannibal just stares at Chiltons Pen that's lying on his bed. A few minutes later, we see Lecter strapped on a hospital stretcher wearing a strait jacket and wearing a monstrous looking face mask. As Chilton is about to sign him in he forgot his Pen and the guards give him a pen, as Chilton signs him in, we get a close up on Lecters face and that face hints that he has something planned. Hannibal gives the senator information of Buffalo Bill but also plays a little game of "Quid Pro Quo" with her as well. As a disgusted senator leaves, he comments on her suit which is referring to what Buffalo Bill does to his victims.

Hannibal is sitting in a temporary a cage until they can give him a cell with a view and he's reading a book and as Clarice enters he greets her without even turning around. Clarice came to give him his drawings and also because she wanted too. This whole scene plays as horrific perverted parody of a love film. As Hannibal plays "Quid Pro Quo" with her, she constantly circles around the cage to keep him in view and when he's finally in view the camera zooms in closer and closer to their faces in each shot which might show a love between them. When it's Lecter’s turn to tell Clarice about the killer, he lets the guards take her away because her time is up, Hannibal gives her the case file and strokes her finger.

After this scene, Hannibal makes one of the best escapes to ever be put on cinema. Before the escape we see a drawing of Clarice with a lamb in her arms while Lecter listens to classical music as he takes out a shiny silver metallic clip from Chilton's missing pen. As the guards are about serve him extra rare lamb chops, they hand cuff him to the bars of the cage and as they serve him, he picks the lock of the cuffs with the clip. He then handcuffs a guard to the bars of the prison and bites off a piece of flesh from the other guard and then smashes his head on the iron bars and sprays mace in the guards eyes. As for the guard that's handcuffed, he brutally beats the cop to death with a riot baton. He then gets lost in the classical music, picks up a knife, and cuts off the wounded guards face off screen. He ties up one dead guard on the cage of the cell, which symbolizes Jesus Christ and Hannibal puts on the guards face like a mask pretending to be a wounded guard, while the real dead guard is on top of the elevator face down with Lecters prison clothes on. As Hannibal is put in the ambulance, he takes off the mask, kills the people in ambulance off screen and it is mentioned in dialogue that he killed a tourist and stole his clothes and cash.

The last and final time we see Lecter is he calls Clarice telling her he won't go after but cuts the conversation short because he's "having an old friend for dinner". After he hangs up the phone, we find out that he's in a tropical Island and the person that he's "having for dinner" is Dr.Chilton who has just arrived on the island. Hannibal puts on his hat and disappears into the crowd. Man what a great exit for a great villain.

Some people find Hannibal over the top or out of place but that's how he was written. Instead of seeing a criminal you'd meet on the street or in the darkness, he's a criminal you'd meet in a library or a fancy restaurant. What's also great about Hannibal is he's a classy psychopath. His well manners; intelligence to get inside peoples minds; eerie voice; cannibalistic instinct; villainous smile; and the fact that he can sense you and read you like a book is what makes him so scary. This villain not only won the Oscar but is also number 8 on The Nostalgia Critic's "Top 11 Scariest Performances"; number 7 on "Bravo's 100 Scariest Movie Moments"; and is the number one villain the American Film institute list of top 50 Film villains.

"I ATE HIS LIVER WITH SOME FAVA BEANS AND A NICE CHIANTI (SLITHER)"
-Hannibal Lecter

Tune in next week for my number 1 favorite villain and my next top list!

MY 3RD FAVORITE MOVIE VILLAIN

ANTON CHIGURH (JAVIER BARDEM)

FROM "NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN"

This is a villain who spreads nothing but chaos, not because he chooses too, it's because he feels like he has too. Every time you see him, he's either killing someone, causing damage, or is just acting plain creepy. What's so chaotic about him, well lets take a look.

WARNING: THERE WILL BE SPOILERS

The first time we see him, he gets arrested but once he's sitting in the officer’s office, he uses his handcuffs to strangle the cop to death. Just by looking at his face while he's killing the cop, he doesn't look like he's enjoying it, he looks like he's forced to do it out of his own free will. Just the image alone shows his insanity. He then breaks free from the cuffs and steals a police car to not just spread chaos but also recover the briefcase full of money with a hidden tracking device he put in the money case.

Anton carries a pistol and a shot gun with a silencer which he uses many times to spread chaos. Every time he uses them has to be one of the most violent killings to ever be put in cinema. He shoots two guys in the head after seeing dead bodies from an off screen massacre; he kills three thugs in a motel room; gets into a breath taking shoot out with one of the main characters; and even randomly shoots a bird while driving. One of my favorite creepy moments with Anton is when he sits in the shadows and has a conversation with a victim while holding out his gun. The interesting thing about those scenes is they ask him why he's doing this and his response is basically telling them that he has too. I think one of the many reasons why I found him so terrifying is his voice, it sounds dark, unpleasant and cold that every time he speaks I get chills.

Anton's preferred weapon of choice is a captive bolt pistol. The first time we seem him using it is when he pulls a stranger over while he's driving a stolen cop car. He tells the guy to get out and to hold still and shoots him in the head with it. Throughout the film we see him use it numerous times to kill people. He doesn't just use it to kill people; he also uses it to break into houses, hotel and motel rooms.

 

Another cool thing about Anton is he can sometimes be fair on determining someone’s fate by tossing a coin and telling his victims to "Call it". The best scene that shows it is when he's randomly talking to an owner of a gas station and during the conversation he flips a coin and tells him to "Call it", that scene is just plain suspenseful. Sure the Batman villain Two Face does it and has made it more memorable (Which oddly enough, one of the stars in this film is Tommy Lee Jones who previously played Two Face in "Batman Forever") but Anton just seems to make it a lot more terrifying.

Anton is also very smart and is a quick thinker who can track people down and find quick ways to heal himself. One of the best examples of him being smart is he blows up a car to distract the people and workers at the Pharmacy, so he can steal some stuff. Another great example is his last scene as he gets into a car accident and quickly talks to two boys of giving him a shirt to cover his broken arm with a bone sticking out. He then bribes the boys and tells them that they never saw him and leaves before the ambulance shows up. 

The main reason why I find Anton so scary is because he's unpredictable. You don't what he's thinking or what he's up too. Every time you see him you just get nervous. You don't know when he's either going to kill or leave a person alive. There are times when he encounters people and half of the time, we just cut to the next scene of him leaving and we never ever see the character again. It's a possibility that the person he encounters could still be alive but then again there's a chance that he just killed them off screen, after all he did kill one of the main characters off screen including a few others.

 Anton is a character that keeps you guessing and guessing even after the films over. You don't even know if he's just a poor soul or is just an insane killer. The truth is will never know which is what makes him a very scary villain. Javier Bardem won the Oscar for his chilling performance and the Nostalgia Critic put him as number three on his "Top 11 Scariest Performances" list, and in my opinion, he deserved it.

"This Is The Best I Can Do. Call It"
-Anton Chigurh

FAMILY GUY

Cartoon TV shows for adults have come a long way. We've had classics such as "South Park", "Futurama", "Robot Chicken","Aqua Teen Hunger Force", even "The Simpsons" was aimed more at an adult audience than family. They always had great characters, funny jokes, good stories (Even if they can be a bit bizarre) and prove that you can do more stuff with animation than with live action. However there is a popular show that tries using all those techniques but does a very poor job doing it and that show is...


Before I go any further let me remind you all that it's just opinion not fact. In case if some of you are wondering why I'm not reviewing the first Season or the pilot episode it's for many reasons, but I'll tell you my 2 main reasons. First off I feel like it would be a waste of my time because I feel like you've seen one "Family Guy" episode, you've seen them all and believe me I've seen a lot. My 2nd reason and probably my number 1 reason why I'm not reviewing the show in Seasons is because I know a lot of people like the show and just to show that I'm a nice guy I feel like it would be necessary just to sum all of my thoughts on the show in one review. So after this review I promise I will not review anything "Family Guy" related but remember I'm only going to make a promise like this for just this one time. With that out of the way, ON WITH THE REVIEW!

Let’s start with the characters. In family style cartoon shows like "The Simpsons" or "King Of The Hill" the main characters are likable, funny and have redeeming qualities after making a serious mistake. The characters in this show are nothing like that. To me they're just poor annoying unfunny idiotic copies of "The Simpsons". Every one of these characters is either just straight out bland, unfunny, boring or just plan annoying. The Mother Lois is just an annoying nag who gets to the point where I want to yell "SHUT THE HELL UP" at the TV. The teenage Son Chris is just as annoying as Lois and it pains me to find out that Seth Green (Creator of "Robot Chicken" and the actor who played Scott Evil in the "Austin Powers" films) is wasting his talent on a character that's not funny. The teenage daughter Meg is just the target of the family’s jokes and some of these jokes are so painful to watch. Brian the talking dog is a complete bore and to be perfectly honest I find nothing likable about him. He's just an alcoholic atheist asshole who loves to have sex with dogs AND WOMAN! What the hell, is he bi? He even has a human son in one episode, HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? The only thing I like about Brian is he can sing swing really well and personally I wish Seth Macfarlene would pursue that career instead of this.

Than there's the father Peter, good god do I hate this character. He's the most annoying character in the whole entire show. His voice is annoying, his design is annoying, his laugh is annoying, and his humor is annoying. I just want to kick his fat ass butt until he shuts up for good. The number 1 reason why I hate this character is because he's obviously a complete rip off of Homer Simpson (One of the greatest cartoon characters in the world) he's fat, he drinks, he's stupid, and even a few times says Homers catch phrase "Doh", that's low on so many levels. The only character I sort of liked is the evil talking baby Stewie, who has a really cool British accent. In the early seasons he would try to take over the world or kill Lois, and when I watched this show as a teen I would look forward to see what Stewie is up too and see what comical mischief he’d get himself into. Sadly as the seasons went he stops being evil and than becomes just annoying as the family.

The supporting characters are just as demented as the main characters. You got the black guy Cleveland who's just a complete bore; You have the crippled cop Joe who's the only guy who makes any sense in this awful show but sadly is just a pun to unfunny cripple jokes; and Quagmire a perverted sick bastard with a annoying catch phrase who loves to have sex or rape woman (Including Marge Simpson on one occasion), that's not funny it's just sick, gross and wrong. Than there's the old man Hebert the pervert who has this girlish voice that was funny at first but then gets annoying after a while where the character now becomes creepy, instead of funny. The only character in the supporting cast I like is Mayor West, why, because he's voiced by Adam West and almost anything he does is funny. The guests that appear on the show are as lame as our main characters but I do like the appearances of James Woods and Wallace Shawn, they were fun to watch.

What can I say about the humor on this show, well every once and a while you'll get a good joke but for the most part the jokes are not funny and don't even flow with the plot. Most of the humor is dumb, demented, unnecessary, gross and pop culture references that are either forced or ripped-off jokes. That's what I can't stand about this show; most of the humor is just pop culture references that are either forced or ripped-off. It's normal for shows to make fun of pop culture or make a movie reference, but this show does it all the time. About 90 percent of an episode is filled with ripped off material, and parodies and references to pop culture that are just there to make the reference. I also hate how they constantly leave the plot and go to a pointless joke that has nothing to do with the plot, it's just stupid, repetitive, and above all pointless! The songs on this show are forgettable and once again are mostly just stupid parodies of songs we know and love. By the way in case if you're wondering what I think about their "Star Wars" parodies, lets just say if I was going to watch a "Star Wars" parody I would either be watching the "Robot Chicken" Star Wars special or my favorite Mel Brooks comedy "Spaceballs".

Now finally the plot to the show, what plot? There basically is no plot to any of these episodes it's just the family being dumb, have a problem, random jokes that take 90 percent of an episode, problem solved and they go back to their ugly and hideous ways. They're not just predictable but they're written poorly and have no morals. Even the Road adventures with Brian and Stewie are just lame, not to mention that the whole road series is just a bad parody of "The Road To series" with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby. The only time when the show had a good moral is Peter telling people to stop smoking and when Brain and Stewie tell everyone to just ask for one gift from Santa (Though that sounds like something out of a kids Christmas Special, than a Christmas Special for adults). Those are good but for the most it’s very rare to get a good story from this show.

Now that I bashed the show I'm sure you're thinking I'm probably going to give a bad rating. Well it is true that I hate "Family Guy" but I can see why it has an audience. Like I said you can get a good laugh from at least one joke per episode and it does do it's job with entertaining people. I may hate it but I don't expect you to hate it too, if you love the show and that gives you good laughs, good for you, don't let my review take that away from you. 

RATING 3/5